I'm Sorry

There are people and there are special people. And some are so special, that you don’t see beyond them. It’s these people, the one’s closest to you, that you end up hurting, intentionally or unintentionally, you’re so close to them that you take this liberty (unfortunately). Words flow, bitterness grows, hearts get broken and friendships go sore.
All said and done you realise you were wrong. What do you do? Say sorry of course. And then, just hope against hope that it works.

I’m sorry 

For all the times I hurt you
For all the things I said to you
For all the days I shunned you
I’m sorry.

For all the times I didn’t care
For all things I didn’t do
For all the days you cried through
I’m sorry.

For all the times you explained
For all the things I didn’t believe
For all the days I stayed away
I’m sorry.

For all the times I doubted you
For all the times I questioned you
For all the days I troubled you
I’m sorry.

If only sorry was a magic word
But sadly it isn’t so
It doesn’t fix broken hearts
Or bruises or sores.
If only sorry could heal and mend
If only sorry could erase pain
If only sorry could turn the clock around
I’d use it in plenty right now.
Hey buddy...I'm sorry.

What More Can I Ask For

A lot of people come into our lives but there are those few who touch deep within. They come and leave an indelible mark on our life. They are the ones who touch deep within, one way or the other. They are the ones we call friends.

Here's a poem I wrote years ago for my friend Sonali, but the same stands true for all my other friends. Today I re-dedicate the poem to all my dearest friends, the stars in the night sky that is my life.

What More Can I Ask For...

Someone…
To lean on
To listen to your woes
To comfort you, to hold you close
What more can one ask for?

Someone…
To count on when times are tough
To share dreams, hopes, aspirations
Even the wildest ones
What more can one ask for?

Someone…
To correct, to reprimand you
To teach, to guide you
To heal, to nurture you
What more can one ask for?

Someone…
Who loves you the way you are
Despite your follies, your faults, your idiosyncrasies
Accepts you unconditionally
What more can one ask for?

Ti’s but a miracle…
To get without asking
To find without looking
That ‘someone’ we call a friend
So true, so fine, so dear

I don’t remember asking
But God gave you to me
What I did to deserve you,
Well, don’t ask me!
What more can I ask for?

-Rukma

Everyone needs a friend

Everyone needs a friend. Anyone who says he/she doesn’t is lying. I for one can vouch for the important role that friends play in one’s life. I have had friends as far back as I can remember. In fact there are two with whom I have literally grown up with. We were born around the same time and lived across the road from each other. Over the years we didn’t meet as often but whenever we did meet we continued from where we left. This I find most amazing.

Then I had my holiday friends. They came to stay at their granny’s place which happened to be in my neighbourhood. We met only during vacations and of course picked up from where we left at the beginning of each vacation.

Then there were the school friends. The three of us made a strong team and we stood by each other and enjoyed school life. This was followed by my higher secondary school friends. We had lots of fun together…and a li’l bit of studying too! And then came my college friends. A close knit group of seven, together we were fun, cute, mischievous, curious, sweet….& studious too!

My colleagues came next. Some are more than mere colleagues, we are friends, and very close at that. In between there came a special person, my teacher, my mentor who is also my friend. He gave a twist to my thinking, my perspective on life. And therein began my spiritual life. After that came a lot of friends who walk the same path as I.

But this blog is not about any of those friends. This blog is about my closest friend…my buddy. My buddy’s entry into my life was most inconspicuous. Really nothing to write home about. We met, we said hi, we acted pricy, we left. Period. Later we met again, we said hi, we argued, we picked at each other and left. And that’s when our friendship began.

Everyone needs a friend

Everyone needs a friend
Someone to stand by you
Someone who loves you
Someone who accepts you
With all your craziness.

Everyone needs a friend
Someone who encourages you
Someone who cherishes you
Someone who helps you
Without hesitation.

Everyone needs a friend
Someone who corrects you
Someone who reprimands you
Someone who stops you
When you’re on the your wrong track.

Everyone needs a friend
Someone who wipes your tears
Someone who share yours joys
Someone who cares for you
More than you can ever fathom.

I found in my buddy all this and more
Words fail me, I can write no more…

A Lifetime Plan

People come into our life for a reason, a season or lifetime...says a popular email fwd. Come to think of it, it sure does make a lot of sense. How else would you explain the discontinuance of close friendships and the disappreaing of people we're close to, for no apparent reason. Like the mail says some people come into our lives for a reason and when that reason no longer exists they go away. Some people stay on for a season, a little longer while. Once that season is over, they're gone. And then there are those few who come into our life to last a lifetime. Their entry may be sudden and out of the blue, but they come and simply stay on. There is a reason that brings them into our life, but they continue to be a part of our life for a lifetime.

At every stage in life we experience this. People come, people go. Some people come and never go. They form an important part of our life and leave an indelible mark on every page of the book of our life. We cannot imagine life without them. We cannot see beyond them. Their absence is frightening and painful. Their company delightful. Ofcourse, there is also the other breed of lifetime people who add excitement to our life with the troubles they cause. My thanks to them too. Life would be boring without them.

But this blog was mainly for the people in my life who are on a lifetime plan. The one's who add colour to my life. The one's who make each day special. The one's who stand by me through the ups & downs of life.

Talking about reasons reminds me of one of my favourite poems called 'There is a reason', composed by Pujya Swami Chinmayanandaji or Gurudev as we lovingly call him. It goes like this...

There is a Reason

There is a Reason
For every pain that we must bear,
For every burden, every care
There is a Reason.

For every grief that crushes our heart
For every scalding tear we shed,
There is a Reason.

For every hurt, for every plight,
For every lonely, painful night,
There is a Reason.

Yet, if we trust God, as we all must,
It can all turn out to be for our good, as
He knows the Reason.

- Swami Chinmayananda